SOUL TALK OVER SELF LOVE

SOUL TALK OVER SELF LOVE

I have a question.

A question for you all!

     How many times in your life you've come across those moments when you were really in love with yourself? 

     How many times has it been that you've said to yourself that you're magical and you love yourself with all your heart and all of your soul?

-----Perhaps not many!

Why?

Why is it that so?

Why do we all not love ourselves as much as we should?

     Ultimately it's we who have to spend the rest of our lives with our own self. Ultimately it's we who have to make our life a colourful and a jubilant journey. 

     If we do not learn to enjoy our own company then how can we form happy ties with others'?

     Wondering why we never gave it a thought? Or if we did then why haven't we worked on it yet?

Answer to all of this is realisation of importance of "Self Love". 

     Now we know that it is important but how exactly can we inculcate it, is the question. In order to do that we must first know what we have been doing wrong in the past.

So what are the hurdles that prevent us from loving ourselves?

1.LACK OF APPRECIATION

     As kids, we never felt appreciated or maybe we were always loved more as a child but while growing up nobody showered us with that much of attention which we got used to. This somehow caused emotional neglect and in quest of gaining others' love we were always left disappointed. This might have made us feel unworthy and that had created a shallow self image leading to lack of self love.

2.COMPARISON

     We often tend to compare ourselves a lot with others' life, their grades, their family, their social circle, their job and their successful life. The moment we see one of our friends' social media post with caption #livingmylife, there's this extreme urge to despise them. In order to live a life of our dreams, we tend to be brutally harsh on ourselves and when we don't attain the desired results, it leads to self destruction.

3.SELF ESTEEM ISSUES

     Some people have a lot of self esteem issues that arises because of several reasons. If you don't feel that you are deserving of beauty, abundance, love, fame, success, family or money or even abundance then you will tend to self sabotage and this will lead to development of self-esteem issues. Majority of self esteem issues also arise due to one of the following reasons:

1.Bad parenting (involving lot of comparison and disapproval)

2.Difficult childhood

3.Loneliness

4.Lack of friends

5.Surrounded by bullying peers or toxic people

6.Undealt failures 

7.Addictions

8.Codependency

9.Indecisiveness

     No matter what the reason is, but research says that self esteem issues disrupts the self image and creates self pity which leads to lots of sorrow and discontent in life.

4.UNHEALTHY BELIEFS ABOUT OTHERS OR ABOUT THE WORLD

     Most of the people tend to curse god or argue with their closed ones or indulge in quarrels with their opponents when something goes wrong in their life. While blaming others they try to prevent their self image but deep down, their conscience gets affected. This leads to creation of low grade emotions and lack of self respect and ultimately lack of love for self.

5.NOT BEING YOUR REAL SELF

     Psychoanalytical Research showed that this is the category where 79 percent of the people fall. People here show the world that they love their life, they love themselves a lot and try to act as if they have high regards of their own. But when the day ends, they are all alone, sitting down and sulking and contemplating over shallowness and emptiness they have in their lives. This boosts up lack of excitement and joy in their lives and it then leads to great amount of dissatisfaction and lack of true love for self.

      So those were the hurdles and now coming to the healing, you must follow certain practices to truly love yourself.

1.EMBRACE YOURSELF

 1.Know yourself thoroughly, all your strengths and your weaknesses.

2.You must give up procrastination. Stop comparing yourself to others.

3.Value things that you have in your life and practice gratitude by being grateful for them.

4.Forgive yourself for the past mistakes by being kind to yourself.

5.Honour your uniqueness and specialness. If not today then tomorrow you will achieve great heights for sure in your life.

6.Stay more around the people who value you for your real self.

7.Happiness must also come from within and so does the Self Love. 

Know that the world needs you and you are much more than WORTHY. You are much more than DESERVING. You are capable of 'GREAT DOINGS' in life.

THERE CAN NEVER BE A BETTER YOU THAN YOU.

         ---Warren Buffet

Treat yourself the way you would treat a three year old! Always think that there's a small child inside you. If you try doing it, I bet, you can never be harsh on yourself. Even when you commit a mistake, just analyze it, learn from it and let go of it. Always remember, it's you, who have to love yourself in the first place!

Remember, the idea of Self Love is not to live only a successful life but a soulful life. Practice these affirmations:

2.DO HARD THINGS DAILY

     Anything that you do great in your life is hard. Self love also takes lot of hardwork involving acceptance, practice, self-forgiveness, self-confidence and taking up of responsibilities. Many people tend to run away from responsibilities when it becomes a daily routine. 

You haven't liked the job- you leave the job.

You haven't liked the people- you leave the people.

You haven't liked the life- will you stop living? 

     No, right? So learn to tackle hard things, build momentum because at the end of it, you will be nothing but very satisfied that you have got the "hard" work done. This will generate a respect for your own self and you will feel sense of achievement.

3.ENJOY NATURE

     Disconnecting from world once in a while and enjoying nature, going to the woods, being surrounded by a lot of flora and fauna or taking up adventurous activities or even stargazing or talking to animals or little birdies or maybe kids can act as a great stressbuster. 

OR

Practice "4 S" :

1.Silence

2.Solitude

3.Stillness

4.Soul-searching

It will not only show you the beauty around you but it will also ignite that urge to be beautiful and be magically happy from within, without needing any materialistic objects or other people in life. This will definitely invoke a great sense of self love! 

4.HELP, HELP AND ALWAYS HELP!

     Now this is last, but it is the most important tip. The more often you help others, the more often you end up putting a smile on someone else's face. What more can we ask for? Seeing others happy makes us happy instantly! Value your contribution to the the world and this will indeed enhance the sweetness of your emotions and it will make you feel like a great person who's always happy from within! 

Remember that Self love is not Vanity, but it's a Sanity!

And last but not the least,

DO NOT LOOSE YOURSELF ON THE WAY TO THE TOP.

             ---Jack Welch.

If you have made it to the end of this blog, I would like to thank you all for taking out your precious time to read this and I hope it was worth it!

         ---HARSHITHA JAIN

             VOGUE ROG.